John 20: 22 AMP “And when He [Jesus] said this, He [Jesus] breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit.”
I have come to realize that the devil knows how to manipulate me and he constantly reminds me of past sins. This year has been one of those difficult years, I would be doing something and a memory pops up and makes me either very sad or really angry. I kept on struggling with these negative thoughts until I realized I have to take control of my thinking. Yes, I know “this and that” happened but I have spoken to the Lord and I have repented and ask the Lord Jesus for the forgiveness of this sin. I also know that I have been forgiven.
Why was I struggling to let things go? Today I realized I didn’t have the faith to accept it. We see Jesus rose from the dead. Jesus breathed on His disciples saying “receive the Holy Spirit.” Jesus also said that “If you forgive the sins of anyone they are forgiven [because of their faith]; if you retain the sins of anyone, they are retained [and remain unforgiven because of their unbelief].”
I have received the Holy Spirit but in my stubbornness, I kept onto past transgressions and when I feel offended by someone I kept holding onto it. Why? The person isn’t even aware that I am angry at them? I am carrying this mad rage around and it isn’t even doing anything to the other person. No, it is keeping me from my peace. What’s wrong with me?
As the Lord Jesus states “If you forgive the sins of anyone they are forgiven [because of their faith];” so it is up to me to forgive, I must let go of this thing that I keep on holding onto. Just short on this sentences tail, “if you retain the sins of anyone, they are retained [and remain unforgiven because of their unbelief].” Oh my goodness, I keep them locked up and it makes me go crazy on top of it too.
I do believe God is speaking to me through dreams and I have come to realise that I have been holding onto so many little things that I cannot move forward. I struggle with my stomach and when I feel upset I walk around with stomach pain constantly, there is no relief. It struck me this morning; it’s the root of bitterness. I need to get rid of this nonsense. I have to think about the people who I feel have offended me and set them free. They don’t even know that I am still angry at them.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus today I am so grateful for this Word. People do offend me on a regular basis and I seem to hold grudges. I keep it locked up in my heart and visit it every now and then. Today Lord Jesus Breath Your Holy Spirit over my life. I forgive the people that have offended me and I set them free. Lord, You reminded me to get to the root of my problem. Today I want to humbly come and ask You please forgive me, I lack the necessary faith. I have been unfaithful and holding onto past sins. I pray to forgive me, I also forgive myself. I also forgive the people who have hurt me knowingly and unknowingly. I pray this in the Holy Name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth my Salvation. Amen
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