Maintaining Balance

I have heard about maintaining balance in one's life but it really does take practise.  I seem to struggle very much with that kind of thinking.  I try and try and often I fail.  I was thinking about it and it struck me the only way I can survive and live my life is by staying committed to the Lord Jesus.  It isn't that easy, I get busy and then I get side tracked.  I get upset with myself and then I start getting impatient with the people around me.  You cannot think that this would change who you are but it actually does.

My life is not worth much, these are thoughts that go through my mind constantly.  I am not the best wife or mother, I should have done more.  I then start feeling so guilty and then I start fighting with everybody around me.  I find that the more unhappy these thoughts make me the more unhappy I want to make the people around me.  How to remedy this?  I get back down on my knees and start praying, start looking for answers in the Bible.  Lord Jesus, please help me, my life is just not that great.  I seem to be so full of myself.

Again I am reminded, Epehsian 3: 18 - 19 "Yvette may you be able to feel and understand, how long, how wide, how deep, and how high His love really is;  and to experience this love for yourselves, though it is so great that you will never see the end of it or fully know or understand it.  And so at last you will be filled up with God Himself."  Lord fill me up so that I may become more like Jesus Christ and less the person I am right now.  I just cannot face the day without You Lord.

So I take the plung, get back down on my knees and pray for the Lord to help me.  I just cannot face this day without Him.  I cannot focus and stay focused, the people are just to fickel and I dont always like them never mind myself.

Have a great evening and a wonderful day.

Sad and heartsore

In South Africa, Wednesday 18 May 2011, we all went to the Voting Stations, my first stop was at the Veterinary.  My little Yorkshire Terrier, Dawie run out of the yard and into the yard of our neighbours and their dog bit my poor little puppies mouth off.  Dawie came home full of blood and everybody at home was upset.  We rushed off to the Vet and he looked at Dawie and apologised to me saying that he could not safe my puppy.  We had to say goodbye to our beloved little Yorkshire Terrier, he will not be following me around the house any longer.  Lord please keep my puppy safe in heaven. 
A vibrant lively little dog with a whole lot of spunk.

Snail?

Boring ....

What if?

“what if” and you know how it goes, you think what if I did this and that, how would my life have turned out.  Ahhh, the what if’s can drive you crazy and to top it off I am frustrated with my situation and then I also seem to be suffering with feelings of feeling lost and I just seem to be thinking how can I fix everything.  My attitude leaves much to be desired, snapping at people and just being so difficult.
I need to bow my knees and thank the Lord for his Grace in my life, Grace to face another day, Grace to realise that something good will come of what I am doing, Grace to know that the Lord is in control over my life and I don’t have to fear tomorrow. 

I received a message on face book, ‘Compliments of the day and hi, you look gorgeous, do u mind my friendship.’  My goodness, I am flattered and then I remember the Mentalist also commented on my wall “so beautiful” Patric Jane is cute.  So is my life boring?  Is it?  I wonder.  ….

Wednesday

The kids have been dropped off at school, Andus went to work and now its time to sit and reflex a little.  Today I dedicate my life into the hands of the Lord because I doubt I can make the day on my own.  I find it is becoming more and more difficult to do things without trusting in the Lord.  I see that on my own I mess up good and solled.
Today if possible I want to check out some sites on how to draw and start doing something in the meantime until the teacher let me know when they can fit me in.

Another day in Paradise ... my paradise

Another day in Paradise …  my paradise

Hmmm I wonder if there is anybody that can relate to my paradise.  Wake up in a mood, your husband has a headache, the kids are trying.  Getting into the office you find that the people you work with are just as bad.  What is wrong with my world?  Why is it so horribly upside down?  I had my quiet time in the morning, I have been taught “bow down before the Lord and stand before kings”.  My goodness it has truly been a terrible day, guess what?  It’s over and tomorrow will be a better day, I am sure.  Each day the sun shines and tomorrow won’t be any different, unless it rains but then I get a beautiful rainbow afterwards. 

So yes it has been a trying day and the most people I dealt with were glum and miserable at least I can go home and just relax.  It is a pitty I missed my Art class, too little people attending.  Ahhh that would have been fun, learning a new skill.  I so wish I can paint a beautiful picture.  Hmmmmm that’s a dream I will follow.

Monday Blues .... sjoe

Monday Blues

It seems we all suffer with Monday Blues, or is it just me.  I had the runs today and my stomach is playing havoc with me.  Then I get to work and my employer insults me with a lamb joke.  I finally get home and make supper, its cold and I am feeling miserable this evening.  My husband come in and said just breath everything is going to be alright.  Hmmm the way I feel I wonder.

Looking up I see one of the posters on the wall and I am starting to feel a little better.  “Ephesians 3: 18 – 19 ‘May you be able to feel and understand, how long, how wide, how deep, and how high His love really is; and to experience this love for yourselves, though it is so great the you will never see the end of it or fully know or understand it.  And so at last you will be filled up with God Himself.’”  I believe God wants me to experience His love toward me.  I believe God is here for me tonight.  I am not alone and God loves me.  Tonight He is here for me. 

I am feeling better, I just need an attitude adjustment and I want to break this feelings of feeling sorry and alone tonight, I have a wonderful husband and great kids in my life, I cannot be suffering with feeling of loneliness and anxiety.  It won’t do.   

Lifting up my chin and facing this evening with the family and knowing that I am able to do anything through the Lord Jesus Christ and I am not afraid.  My life is in the hand s of the Lord.  Moving forward and looking life in the face I am able to handle it.

Not actually sure that I can inspire anybody but I have come to realise that I must be an inspiration to my husband because he doesn’t suffer that much with depression as he did before we got married.  It must be the Lord healing his broken heart and mine. 

Monday Blues, you’re out, Sun shine and smiles are in this evening.

Yippy and best of all tomorrow night I start my classes with Fine Arts, learning how to draw and then hopefully I will paint a beautiful painting.  Hmmm that sounds like fun!!  The old lady is getting new interests and looking forward to it. J