by Yvette van Niekerk
Ephesians
4: 26 NIV
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are
still angry,”
Why am I struggling with sleeplessness these days?
I do fall asleep instantly but wake up any time of the night; it could be
between 01:00 am to 3:00 am. It struck me this morning that I am really
frustrated and so angry. How do I deal with these angry thoughts, mulling through
me? It’s clear when I am so angry I just have no peace of mind. I toss and turn
the whole night. Because of my angry thoughts, I have to come to realise it is
spilling over into every other area in my life.
I need to confront my anger and stop focussing on
it, I think I have internalised it to the extent I get upset and frustrated
immediately with people who tell lies, try and pull the wool over my eyes and
pretend they know it all.
The negativity of this anger I am carrying around
with me, cause me to be cranky and irritable, not dealing with issues the right
way. Because I realise I am not getting the right amount of rest and my sleep
is constantly broken. I know that with age we don’t sleep as much as we used to
but strangely I actually need my 8 hours of sleep. I believe sleeping causes my
blood cells to rejuvenate and regenerate themselves, cleaning all toxic waste
from my body. My old cells are being replaced by new cells and my hormones and
tissue are being rejuvenated. So when I am sleeping I can become whole again.
I know even when I do fall asleep, and I didn’t
deal with my anger issues, I have stored it up somewhere to nurse it another
day. The sad part is, when it does come up again it won’t give up or give in. I
know God’s word is clear about going to bed angry. I try and make peace but I
find it getting harder and harder and this is causing calluses over my
painful experience. When I stew over this problem I fear I am becoming bitter,
and revengeful. Is there a solution to my problem? I think there is, but am I
willing to actually consider the solution?
My experience in this matter must be one of
expertise but I seem to fail every time.
I know when I feel so rejected, insulted and manipulated that I should stop,
take a breath and consider what is taking place. Then take this matter up with
the Lord. In sitting down taking my Bible and reading some verses from the
Psalms, praying through my angry thoughts and dealing with the issues that are
tearing at my heart through the only divine intervention I know.
Why read the Bible? This causes us to become
positively infused. God’s word is living water and when we sit down, focus on
His word and pray about the problems, we become rejuvenated and looking forward
to a good night’s rest. When I focus on the Lord every night, my thoughts are
moved away from negativity and I start to become confident and feel perfect the
next day.
Take these issues in my stride and dealing with
people who think they know everything becomes easier and I feel I can take-up
the challenge and opportunities that the Lord God’s has with my life, His plans for me through
God love for me.
Prayer
Lord,
Father, God, humbly I confess that I still stumble and fall when my anger
issues come to play. I feel hurt and rejected, I feel let down and many times I
am shocked at the way I am being treated. Lord, You know who is making me feel
like this, I want to bring them before You today, I pray that You Lord, will
deal with them. I pray to bless them today richly and give them what their heart
desires. To the extent, that they will grab it with both their hands. Thank You
Lord, for hearing my plea and thank You, that I can come in humble pray,
confessing my problems. In the Name of Jesus Christ. Amen
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